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I haven’t heard many people talk about it but July is disability pride month. It’s two days until august now and I think it’s a shame we don’t talk about it.

Many people forget that I’m autistic and that often causes me to lose friendships. I’ve just recently lost one and it still hurts. I tried to help a friend who just used me, abused me and never saw me as a friend anyway. I was too available to help all the time, too naive. Sometimes I think that’s the fault of my autism.

I feel lost right now. I just made a video about it on Youtube. I know my values and interests, but have a hard time figuring out my life purpose.

While it seems like other people have it together and know what they want, I’m sitting here clueless. I want to be proud over me being autistic, but I simply am not…

Is it fair to force me to be proud over something that’s just ruin my life?

I don’t know.